Explaining....ME!!!!

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=130760
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=130839


Explaining...........

Could u imagine the madness that molded my anger
from holdin my pain as im unloadin on pavement
to uncontrolable rage as im explodin on strangers!
I know in my brain its effects of blows from all angles
step dads fists to the face as my necks holdin his fingers
til i grow to the ages when i jus let go of my patience
so overloaded wit hatred i grow to blow and not take shit!!!


Me.............

My body tempature rises and blood boils til my brains hurt
if im explodin im unloadin wit fury til my damn veins burn!!!!!!


Now lifes abuse lit the fuse but disrespect ignites the flame
why fight to change and u-turn when both left and rights the same
all paths in life bring rage, destruction and war with inner peace
i stored that sin in me til it all caused horrid tendencies
and if your offendin me my control is goin, goin gone
ill try holdin on but burnin blisters of rage r growin strong
so damn strong, they burst and i jus cant stay holdin on
control is gone and inner peace is conquered by swingin endlessly
tremendously swingin knuckles to all that hold contempt for me
shit simply means if u temptin me my reserved rage is emptying!!!!!

Nice. Got a good picture from this. Felt that way a couple of days myself.

One

Oh...peep this...three lefts will always make it right.

wow....ur one actually makes sense....da lines r full long though....buh fullly sik...i luv it...n thanx for d other commments...im onli a beginner

your rhyming was off... thats the most important thing, so... i didnt really find this worth the read... content wise, not bad, but if it dont rhyme, then what is it?.. a poem?....
..towards the end it picked up, but..... seen better, alot better... work on your transitions.....

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