......

[.Relentless.]

keyd

I made up my mind, theres no more time to waste
im tired of waiting on a free ride before i find a grave
the deus of living a limited life have long been payed
Because ever since my first thought, ive felt like a walking cage
so now its time for me to take off these chains
release the thoughts and take the padlocks off my brain
if success is a mountain you have to climb then im on my way
Ready to give it a hundred and ten percent before i walk away
Because Rap is a cash crop and my thoughts cultivate
so by for now but when i come back you can keep the change
because i wont.. Prodigy will still be the same
And the rest can hate.. because this is just a leep of faith
a test of my strength to see if i can keep the pace
and i will never seek the greats until i set the pace
untill i stop breathin you will hear me say defeat can wait
how can i give up or seize to be great
when i'm Infatuated by this hatred, and consumed by rage,
so fucking Brain sick to use it, to get paid
i feel like a lunatic thats glued to the page
Because i share my views to this #2, and it don't refuse to explain
all this abuse i go threw induced with this much pain
either i was born with a short fuse, or i'm just insane
fuck it, i'm just this way, i'm just a man
but if you came from dust, i came from sand
put here to kick you up and see what you take me as
because i will never put on a front or a staging act
when i'm tensed up, raging mad
ill turn into a dragon with a Jayson's mask
and start breathing fire thats hotter than Cajun hash
a maniac thats crazy enough to stab you to death with a blade of grass
i see where your at but i'm aiming past, so make way for the man





http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...125/index.html
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...251/index.html
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...179/index.html

[El Heisenberg]

okay first let me lay it down for you... I can understand if you misspell words by shorting it like Yu, Ur, etc you get the idea... But when you text and that shit is spelled wrong.... Way off the mark... that shit is a turn-off lyrically speaking.
But overall your verse was a good simple piece nice to read. Emotion was put forth into it and i can appreciate that. For joints like these it can be more complexer but not necessary. I like some of the metaphors you put into this one. Nice job

[.Relentless.]

thanks for feeding this.. as you can see it was a keyed verse and so i didn't spend too much time on spelling but in the future i will.. again thanks.

[.Relentless.]

uppin because i added more...

[Dex'Labb]

Why the fuck is every single new writer here the same. all ur verses are either 'kill myself with suicide pills' or 'I'm going to take over one day in this rap game' are u THAT close minded, OPEN UR MIND

[.Relentless.]

lol

[El Heisenberg]

okay i see you changed it up added some new bars... The flow was great but it was shaky a little on some points then you built it back up with some harsh multies.. Some patterns showed which was good highlighted and flared your concept. Good story telling and nice wordplay. pretty good vocab and this was a great read. good job

[Tool]

battle links do not count

try skimming this thread; http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...652/index.html

you want this reopened contact me or another mod with relevant links

piece.