10 - 16 lines. Due Sunday Night.
10 - 16 lines. Due Sunday Night.
@AeeYo I went 10.
His parents thought it'd be dandy, liked the thought of a family..
Nine months later wished they had opted for plan B!
Its a Damn shame that they planned Aeey, like a best case scenario!
You're flows been borderline so long, you're the next Lake Ontario.
Got em draggin like Gyrados! But his talent is a Magikarp!
Plus he's Tin man in oz....pal just never had the heart...
And the saddest part? Keeping up with me'll wind up overloading his pistons..
Bout to prove I'm triple Aeey like roadside assistance!
I'm closing the distance then Im planning on snapping your neck jerk...
Started your name w/ A&E...now in 48hours your murder will be broadcast on their network!
@Phalanx Cool, I'll go 10 too...
to ever find you cook'n is rare, the cupboard is bare, niggas is hungry with they plates out
spits is easy take outs, we can't find decent roasts in ya verses, you got us all on a steak-out//
is this really all you got? if you gonna shoot, you need to pull the trigger, your ^^shit is played out
i see you're like Paul Pierce behind a line, drop a "check" on niggas, then hit 'em with a fake out//
nigga, you sayin shit like "Congratulations..." or "Happy Thanksgiving" followed by a lengthy post
your history is littered with no-shows and dickriders, that 8-1 record seems more like an empty boast//
nothin dope about you, i'ma make the whole forum doubt you, so Phalanx, try me with your frail shots
all your written deliveries is pussy, nigga, there's no doubt your posts are hitting the male-box//
but you think this is a game, huh? fuk your fake ass, me and your moms knows who you is, dun
she at Homer head in her hands thinking why did I ever give birth to such a bitch ass Sim-son//
So yea, wow.. this battle was very interesting.. I been peepin @Phalanx and dude got some skills to be honest, with work, he could be a serious contender in any forum. Then you got @Sinning , that I've personally considered wack, who was obviously and apparently been improving with each and every drop. Never thought he'd catch Phalanx slippin but here's my breakdown.
His parents thought it'd be dandy, liked the thought of a family..
Nine months later wished they had opted for plan B!
^ Very short and to the point, not personalized, to a fault, but not a bad opener
Its a Damn shame that they planned Aeey, like a best case scenario!
You're flows been borderline so long, you're the next Lake Ontario.
^On point w/how he's dropped so far, but vague and unappealing in terms of delivery. The setup didn;t aide in the sting of the punch what so ever.
Got em draggin like Gyrados! But his talent is a Magikarp!
Plus he's Tin man in oz....pal just never had the heart...
^Interesting double play in the set up and punch but they in no way correlate and are not at all personal so they lose sting tremendously.
And the saddest part? Keeping up with me'll wind up overloading his pistons..
Bout to prove I'm triple Aeey like roadside assistance!
^Pretty good, minus the obvious metaphor that could've been worked around but, good delivery, short, sweet and personal with the nameplay
I'm closing the distance then Im planning on snapping your neck jerk...
Started your name w/ A&E...now in 48hours your murder will be broadcast on their network!
^Good concept, poor setup and poor wording on that closing delivery ruined the punch here
Vs
to ever find you cook'n is rare, the cupboard is bare, niggas is hungry with they plates out
spits is easy take outs, we can't find decent roasts in ya verses, you got us all on a steak-out//
^very nicely set up and direct with an attempted personal, wording almost ruined this for you, but good punch.
is this really all you got? if you gonna shoot, you need to pull the trigger, your ^^shit is played out
i see you're like Paul Pierce behind a line, drop a "check" on niggas, then hit 'em with a fake out//
^Nicely done, setup coulda been better
nigga, you sayin shit like "Congratulations..." or "Happy Thanksgiving" followed by a lengthy post
your history is littered with no-shows and dickriders, that 8-1 record seems more like an empty boast//
^Interesting attempt at a personal, the setup did nothing to help the punch though and the sting declined very much because of it, the first line became all but filler after the shot.
nothin dope about you, i'ma make the whole forum doubt you, so Phalanx, try me with your frail shots
all your written deliveries is pussy, nigga, there's no doubt your posts are hitting the male-box//
^This was ok, the setup should've aided your delivery but not too bad overall.
but you think this is a game, huh? fuk your fake ass, me and your moms knows who you is, dun
she at Homer head in her hands thinking why did I ever give birth to such a bitch ass Sim-son//
^Decent close, this could've been dope had you set it up with any tag along for the Simpson line, or at least called him dumb in the first line and came with Simp-)le(-son in the close, but still, not a bad ending
Damnnnnnn..... As I get to the end here, I realize that @AeeYo is one of the competitors not Sinning.... lol smdh I almost feel dumb, but Aeeyo bro, you clearly need to elevate if you're even being mentioned in the same sentence as that clown. I was bouta say this is the most improved I've ever seen someone over the course of a couple weeks, I had my whole spilll planned out, now I'm just feelin slow frfr. Still, overall here you can see that the opponent vs Phalanx in question, managed to over shadow the former in terms of concepts/personals/ and even wordplay. I generally prefer the short bar style of someone like Phal ... but with the lack of connection in the punches that quick witted delivery fell flat versus a more precise/specific/ and conceptually superior opponent in V/Aeeyo not Sinning, sorry.
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!
to ever find you cook'n is rare, the cupboard is bare, niggas is hungry with they plates out
spits is easy take outs, we can't find decent roasts in ya verses, you got us all on a steak-out//
-this is more of a stmt...no actual punch...bad start
is this really all you got? if you gonna shoot, you need to pull the trigger, your ^^shit is played out
i see you're like Paul Pierce behind a line, drop a "check" on niggas, then hit 'em with a fake out//
-ok...wording sucked but it's ok
nigga, you sayin shit like "Congratulations..." or "Happy Thanksgiving" followed by a lengthy post
your history is littered with no-shows and dickriders, that 8-1 record seems more like an empty boast//
-no
nothin dope about you, i'ma make the whole forum doubt you, so Phalanx, try me with your frail shots
all your written deliveries is pussy, nigga, there's no doubt your posts are hitting the male-box//
-w0w this is not good
but you think this is a game, huh? fuk your fake ass, me and your moms knows who you is, dun
she at Homer head in her hands thinking why did I ever give birth to such a bitch ass Sim-son//
Simpson bars been done a trillion times and this 1 is bad
Vs
His parents thought it'd be dandy, liked the thought of a family..
Nine months later wished they had opted for plan B!
-no punch but I see u r just warming up for ur next line
Its a Damn shame that they planned Aeey, like a best case scenario!
You're flows been borderline so long, you're the next Lake Ontario.
-niice
Got em draggin like Gyrados! But his talent is a Magikarp!
Plus he's Tin man in oz....pal just never had the heart...
-light
And the saddest part? Keeping up with me'll wind up overloading his pistons..
Bout to prove I'm triple Aeey like roadside assistance!
-dope
I'm closing the distance then Im planning on snapping your neck jerk...
Started your name w/ A&E...now in 48hours your murder will be broadcast on their network!
-light jab
V- phal
His parents thought it'd be dandy, liked the thought of a family..
Nine months later wished they had opted for plan B!
Wasn't really feeling this one..the connections could've been better is all..but it was still kind of dope..
Its a Damn shame that they planned Aeey, like a best case scenario!
You're flows been borderline so long, you're the next Lake Ontario.
Not really going along with this one..was decent at best..
Got em draggin like Gyrados! But his talent is a Magikarp!
Plus he's Tin man in oz....pal just never had the heart...
This was good..niice..
And the saddest part? Keeping up with me'll wind up overloading his pistons..
Bout to prove I'm triple Aeey like roadside assistance!
Cool..decent..
I'm closing the distance then Im planning on snapping your neck jerk...
Started your name w/ A&E...now in 48hours your murder will be broadcast on their network!
Good..decent..
Aeeyo -
to ever find you cook'n is rare, the cupboard is bare, niggas is hungry with they plates out
spits is easy take outs, we can't find decent roasts in ya verses, you got us all on a steak-out//
Wasn't feeling this..could've been better is all..
is this really all you got? if you gonna shoot, you need to pull the trigger, your ^^shit is played out
i see you're like Paul Pierce behind a line, drop a "check" on niggas, then hit 'em with a fake out//
Not feeling this either..could've been better..
nigga, you sayin shit like "Congratulations..." or "Happy Thanksgiving" followed by a lengthy post
your history is littered with no-shows and dickriders, that 8-1 record seems more like an empty boast//
I suppose this was ..alright..decent..
nothin dope about you, i'ma make the whole forum doubt you, so Phalanx, try me with your frail shots
all your written deliveries is pussy, nigga, there's no doubt your posts are hitting the male-box//
your best bar probably..decent..
but you think this is a game, huh? fuk your fake ass, me and your moms knows who you is, dun
she at Homer head in her hands thinking why did I ever give birth to such a bitch ass Sim-son//
not feeling this one..could've made a book punch..but didn't execute..lol..
Overall -
decent battle here..pretty good..but I have to go with the one I thought had the better bars, and that's phalanx..vote..phalanx..
V/ Phalanx..
Phal is leading 2-1 upping
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Its a Damn shame that they planned Aeey, like a best case scenario!
You're flows been borderline so long, you're the next Lake Ontario.
And the saddest part? Keeping up with me'll wind up overloading his pistons..
Bout to prove I'm triple Aeey like roadside assistance!
vs
nigga, you sayin shit like "Congratulations..." or "Happy Thanksgiving" followed by a lengthy post
your history is littered with no-shows and dickriders, that 8-1 record seems more like an empty boast/
( for the attempt at a personal... again.. my advice would be try wordplay, nameflips, wits...something that stands out... until then, ur just gonna be an easy win for these guys...
V- Phal
His parents thought it'd be dandy, liked the thought of a family..
Nine months later wished they had opted for plan B!
...simple but lolz, good...
Its a Damn shame that they planned Aeey, like a best case scenario!
You're flows been borderline so long, you're the next Lake Ontario.
...blah...
Got em draggin like Gyrados! But his talent is a Magikarp!
Plus he's Tin man in oz....pal just never had the heart...
...blah, wizard of oz lines, really...
And the saddest part? Keeping up with me'll wind up overloading his pistons..
Bout to prove I'm triple Aeey like roadside assistance!
...good, coulda flipped it n made it hit harder but good...
I'm closing the distance then Im planning on snapping your neck jerk...
Started your name w/ A&E...now in 48hours your murder will be broadcast on their network!
...good concept, bad wording. Good bar...
Vs
to ever find you cook'n is rare, the cupboard is bare, niggas is hungry with they plates out
spits is easy take outs, we can't find decent roasts in ya verses, you got us all on a steak-out//
...terrible wording and the build up to such a bland punch line was worse...
is this really all you got? if you gonna shoot, you need to pull the trigger, your ^^shit is played out
i see you're like Paul Pierce behind a line, drop a "check" on niggas, then hit 'em with a fake out//
...u use a Paul pierce punch in reference to him playing ball, wow. This is bad...
nigga, you sayin shit like "Congratulations..." or "Happy Thanksgiving" followed by a lengthy post
your history is littered with no-shows and dickriders, that 8-1 record seems more like an empty boast//
...no punch...
nothin dope about you, i'ma make the whole forum doubt you, so Phalanx, try me with your frail shots
all your written deliveries is pussy, nigga, there's no doubt your posts are hitting the male-box//
...no...
but you think this is a game, huh? fuk your fake ass, me and your moms knows who you is, dun
she at Homer head in her hands thinking why did I ever give birth to such a bitch ass Sim-son//
...allllllllllmost...
V. Phalanx
Body
Now I am become death; destroyer of worlds.
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And the saddest part? Keeping up with me'll wind up overloading his pistons..
Bout to prove I'm triple Aeey like roadside assistance!
I'm closing the distance then Im planning on snapping your neck jerk...
Started your name w/ A&E...now in 48hours your murder will be broadcast on their network!
vs
nigga, you sayin shit like "Congratulations..." or "Happy Thanksgiving" followed by a lengthy post
your history is littered with no-shows and dickriders, that 8-1 record seems more like an empty boast//
nothin dope about you, i'ma make the whole forum doubt you, so Phalanx, try me with your frail shots
all your written deliveries is pussy, nigga, there's no doubt your posts are hitting the male-box//
Even though I quoted two bars from both there really wasn't a ton of cleverness or wit in this battle.. nevertheless.. the battle spirit was present. Aeeyo you're going to have to adjust your flow if you want to do text battles. Obviously you rap because you're writing text battles like rap verses. Stop doing that, it's limiting you. You're too worried about that next multi instead of a witty concept. Go read battles from the greats in HOF and learn true text style.. you'll get better very quickly. You obviously have a mind to craft disses and personals, once you stop focusing on rapping and start really texting you'll be a threat. Phalanx you already get it but you to need work on concepts. Too basic.. practice misdirection it'll help you a ton.
v/Phal for the AAA punch basically.
I liked this battle, both participants had some stand out lines. I think phalanx had a better verse. It was smoother to read, like I didn’t have to reread the lines to get them the first time around and I didn’t have to take note of things like “quotation marks”. Also his verse just had more relevant content. I think you did a great job tho aeyo but this time it just wasn’t good enough.